What if?


Last night I watched this video clip of What if?

And I want to write the same to you today…

May love, what if it is possible? What if there will be breakthrough and we will be able to be together?
What if we were meant to be together and this is really the will of God and heaven is orchestrating our relationship and when exactly we are going to get together?
What if what we felt and shared with one another there was really real?
What if there is something like true love and we were so lucky and blessed to experience it toward one another? What if there is a way for us to be together?
What if God will really make a way where there seem to be no way?
What if God will supernaturally keep on guiding us and putting things in place for us to be together?

What if?

What if your life is not over but your life is still worth living, still worth exploring, still worth dreaming…. what if?
What if the plans God has for you really are plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future?

What if God is really able to heal and restore your body completely? What if we are going to miraculously have our own children, apart from the ones we will adopt?
What if?

What if God is really good?
What if God really does miracles? What if God is really for you and not against you?
What if God really will work our everything for the good because you love him?
What if God’s promises are reliable and trustworthy?
What if?

What if the plans God has for you is really far above what you can dream or imagine?
What if, my love?
What if we can keep on hoping? What if we can keep on dreaming? What if we can keep on trusting the God for miracles?
What if, my love, what if?

Well, as I write this, my heart comes alive, my heart soars, my heart explodes with expectation and hope!

What if everything is really hopeless and there is no way out or no way we will ever be together? What if you are really doomed by your circumstances and you will never be able to break free from the bondages that you find yourself in?
What if your life really is over and God does not actually have a plan?

What if what we experienced was not real and God is not in this?

Well, as I write this my heart cringes and it feels like I am writing a lie because it is.It is a lie.

I know the heart of God, I know the quality life that God has for each one of us. I know the dreams he has for our lives are really far above what we can dream or imagine.

My goodness, it is so good to know that I have been set free by the truth. I just can’t see the hopelessness because I see Jesus.

My dearest love,

This is really all that I wish for you to see: the goodness of God, the love of God, the depth of God, the desire of the heart of God, who you are in him, who he called you to be. What his plans are for your life.

My love, if I am not part of that in your heart, then it is really okay because far above my desire to love you, be with you and to be loved by you, is my desire for you to have a life of God encounter and a life where you know Him deeply and walk with Him daily.

That is the depth of what I desire for you.

SEE God, see yourself.

But again, out of the abundance of my heart,can I just tell you how much I love you and what I think of you?

I love you in a way that I still need to figure out what to do with it. I love you from the abundance of who I am and though I lack description I love you with everything and all angles and continually and fully, for eternity and then always after that still.

My heart is warm, full, aware, inlove. I am yours and will always be. I will love you to the fullest capacity that can be birthed in me and I will love you like this always.
You are my one true love, what if I am yours too? I deeply adore you, my sweet man. I deeply love you.

Always yours



I do not love you more…

I wrote this 22 July 2016

My dearest love,

Today you are on my heart, like you are on my heart everyday… Today I think about you like I think about you every day. And today I want to write a letter to you, not from my logic, circumstances or facts… I want to write a letter to you from my heart and from a place of my lack of understanding in how all of this works…

This morning my one friend told me that last night he had a dream that I was talking to you over the phone in your language. Apparently I started off in English and asked you how you were doing and then I switched over to your language and he could not understand anymore what I was saying. He said that it looked like it was very nice for me to speak to you… And wow… I just imagined how it would be to phone you and speak to you in a language that we both can understand.

So, I don’t know if it was this that stirred my desire to communicate with you again, but all I know is, that I miss you and desire communication with you, more than you can imagine.

The only thing that is constant, real, deep and forever, is my love for you. I can try and get angry, try and feel despondent, try and push you away and remove you from my heart, but I can’t.

I love you really, I love you completely, I love you. And in this season when it is actually possible to see you again, I really don’t know what to make of it. I don’t know how it will be to see you again, if you even want to see me again. I would love to see you. 

I would love to see you every day for the rest of my life, or even for a moment, a second, a day- that will also be enough.

 I just want to see your eyes again. I just want to see what is in your heart. I just want you to see what is in my heart for you and how much I love you. How deep and constant and real and forever my love is for you.

I am looking forward to eternity because I will have eternity to show you how much I love you. I am looking forward to every morning when I wake up because I know that it is one day closer to the day that I will see you again, even if I might never see you on earth, I know it is one day closer to eternity when I will see you again.

But, my love, I really hope and believe that I will see you again. That I will hold you again, that I will feel your hand in mine again, that you will hold me again in a long embrace, that you will kiss my cheek… I miss you… 

I miss to see your quality…

I want to be by your side and fight and work and be in the Kingdom of God. I want to stand with you through every trial, every victory, every beautiful moment and every day for as long as we both shall live.  And then, I want to still see you for eternity in heaven with our DAD and best friend, Jesus.

My love, you are constantly before me. I would see someone that sort of look like you and I would imagine what it would be like to see you again.

You have changed my whole life, my whole being, my whole outlook on life and I love you for it.

I am overwhelmed this very moment, with the passionate love that I feel for you. It burns, it’s alive, it is real, it is in me, it is around me , it is beyond me. I have a constant companion, and this companion is love for you.

I love you with my pain, my joy, my disbelief, my hopes, my heart and my being.

I love you

Man of God, find God’s heart, more than anything else, desire intimacy with Him, more than anything else.  Be obedient to His voice more than to any other voice and know that I believe that God’s perfect will will be done. No doubt about it.

Father’s faithfulness is everlasting and he knows what he desires for both you and me and what our destinies are. I love you constantly and forever.

May God’s will be done, not mine, and not yours. Eventhough this is how I feel, I don’t want any of this if it is not God’s will…

So, I don’t love you more than obedience to Christ

I don’t love you more than doing the will of God

I don’t love you more than my love for God and my intimacy with Him

I don’t want you more than what I want to know God, experience God and discover who He is.

I don’t desire you more than I desire my First love, my Jesus, my Father, my Holy Spirit.

There’s not place for you in my heart and life in the same way that there is place for my God in my life.

But you are my second love, you are my next desire and you are my deepest human love…

And you have the next most significant place in my heart.  I love you.

You are my impossible that I believe will become possible

You are my dream that I believe will become reality

You are my highest hope, my craziest aim and my deepest desire, apart from my awesome God.

I love you and I will continue loving you and continue praying for you and continue longing for you and continue believing that God will make a way for us, if it is his will.

Did I say I love you?

I love you.

Always yours


Just one more day

There’s a place so powerful
A place that feels like live electricity
A place where excitement and expectation breeds
A place where no force in the universe can stop you
Where you are convinced, persistent and determined
The force of hope inside you drives you
This place is a place of immovable faith.

There is a place that is so powerful
A place where you can not imagine that it is possible to make it through another day
A place where all logic, all reality and all sanity screams so loud you have no idea why you don’t just listen
A place where doubt and despondency stands as giants before you
And at times it seems you have no idea what is driving you
This is a place of immovable faith

Now faith is being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you do not see

What if you hold on just a little bit longer?
What if you don’t give up just yet?
You can do it… just one more day
And you tell yourself that tomorrow again

Healing, breakthrough, victory, inventions, love stories, miracles, life, dreams fulfilled, obstacles ovetcome, books written, dept paid, prayers answered…

And that is a place so powerful


If I could display my love

If my love for you could be a sunrise, I would choose it to be the sunrise on your toughest day… so that its light, warmth and beauty can give you hope as you wake up to it and it displays its glorious colours.

If my love could be a flower, I would choose it to be a common flower that you see everywhere. So that you can’t go far without being aware of it and it displays that it is ever present.

If my love for you could be a tree, I would choose it to be a tree with the deepest routes. So that it will display that its immovable and will survive in the toughest of circumstances.

Love will endure
Love will heal
Love is the greatest

And I love that I can love you.

Always yours


Framed by black

​And you have stared so long at the desolated land…
And all you see is the black ashes of everything consumed by the destruction life holds… 

But you forget, under ground hope is alive. New fresh greens are waiting to burst forth through the death now visible.

And then it happens… the first bright green stem, spectacularly framed by black.

It was there, all along… just waiting for the rain. 

My love… hope is alive… and I am so glad you finally got some light, some life, some hope…

I celebrate with you, 7/7/17… no coincidence there… you received your acceptance as a refugee.

You finally got your papers… 
Now build your life further… 
Nothing can stop you… 
Dream big… 
Embrace life…
Forgive and live. 

Life is truly beautiful.


More freeing than finding God

Is there anything more profoundly freeing than finding God?
Yes! And a thousand times yes!

Delving into the endless riches and beauty of who God is! There you find a more profound freedom…

Connecting in the depths of who you are, to the glory of His being! There you find a more profound freedom…

Exploring the revelation of who you are, because of Him! There you find a more profound freedom…

Allowing Him to pour out His elaborate, extravagant and fierce love into you! There you find a more profound freedom…

In God, there is always more truth to be discovered, and this will continually set you free and take you into a greater revelation of the complete and perfect freedom you actually already have…

Don’t just find Him… discover Him, befriend Him and fully come to know Him.